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Day 22 - How Have You Changed in the Last Two Years

OOOOPS!!!  I missed a day!!  Now I have to do day 22 after day 23.  So, that sucks and it's now out of sync.  I don't like being out of sync.

How have I changed in the last two years?  Gosh, I am not sure how to answer this question.  Physically, I have changed a lot and changed back.  I lost weight, I gained weight, lost a little, gained a lot back.  It's a frustrating battle and I don't know how to conquer it.  Very irritating.

I think I have become ornerier and grumpier, but most of that has happened in the last few months.  I am dealing with a few things at work that have made that part of me come out a bit.  And being that frustrated does not help me in the weight department.  I am a stress/emotional eater - so when things get to me, I tend to eat more.  I have honestly felt my blood pressure increase by leaps and bounds.  I have worked very hard to never have to be on blood pressure medication and to actually feel your blood pressure go up is not a good feeling.  I have honestly thought about retiring and moving on I have been so frustrated - but, then I realize this is a short-term issue and I need to hold out and see what the outcome is.  I truly want to stay where I am and work through this - and see the new building built and open and be a part of that.  However, that doesn't stop me from looking at airline and travel jobs every chance I get.

I have had to find a way of separating myself from my children's lives a bit - as they grow and move into their own worlds, I have to let them live.  Though, I try and have some sort of contact with them every day, there are those times that I don't (mostly with my boy).  They are growing up and making decisions of their own - so I am trying to give them the space they deserve.  Having an empty nest is so different for me - but, it is also a very nice and good life.  Ted and I enjoy our time alone and together - just as much as I enjoy the time I spend with my kids.

I have a new hobby that I have developed over the last couple of years.  It actually takes a lot of my time in the evening.  I can't say that it's enjoyable to sit at my computer for one or two hours a day everyday and enter sweepstakes nonstop - but, I love the return it gives me.  Even when I play an instant win game and I win a Snickers bar (I abhor Snickers), it gives me a little high to see that "Congratulations" winning screen.  Coolest beans!!  Having been on two trips now from my hobby, I can say that it's an awesome feeling.

I am a little older and a little wiser and a lot more proficient in my devil's advocate attitude.  What more can you ask for?
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Comments

  1. SaraFebruary 10, 2012 at 8:53 AM

    I would just die if you retired on me!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. CocoFebruary 10, 2012 at 8:57 AM

      Yeah, not likely to happen - but, a girl can dream ya know - - I just have to make it through this horrible time!!!!

      Delete

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