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One of Those Weekends

It really has been one of those out of control weekends.  Not me being out and being out of control, but out of control eating and stupid stuff.

This whole weekend I have been out of control eating.  I will control myself for part of the day and the other part I'm going crazy.

Friday....... cookies at my mothers and other crap.  My mother always has crap at her house and when you're there, "do you want a cookie little girl?"  My mother weighs less than 100 pounds - she hasn't always, she just has been a lucky person who was able to lose the weight after gastric bypass and kept it off.  When she got sick she lost probably another thirty pounds that she could not afford to lose.  I could probably piggy back her and not feel a thing at this point.  She can eat cookies, she needs to eat cookies, I do not need to eat cookies and I will eat them if they are offered because I don't have the wherewithal to turn it down.

Saturday...... started out ok.  Pretty healthy breakfast, eggs with lean ham and whole wheat toast.  We got pizza for lunch at the yard sale, ate only one piece with a piece of crazy bread.  Dinner was a community barbecue.  I ate pretty good as far as the regular food, except I probably didn't need the chips, but then I ate a churro and a cookie.... and cupcakes.  Today, I've eaten ok - except the cupcakes........

Let me tell you about the cupcakes.  I usually make cupcakes for the barbecue every year.  This year, I was going to make them and for some reason I burnt the bottom of some of them.  So after going through them, I didn't feel that I had enough to try and get them to the barbecue.  So when I got home yesterday, I frosted them and figured everyone in the house would help eat them.  Raja and Rustie didn't eat any.  KayeLynn had one last night.  Ted had a couple of unfrosted cupcakes last night with strawberries.  The rest were here today.  I have been eating them and eating them.  I finally said ENOUGH!!!!!  I threw the rest of them away.  All I can think about now is how miserable I am from eating them.  I am sick.  I am nauseated.  I am angry with myself.  I frustrated.  Stupid cupcakes.  Stupid me.

Now, let me tell you about the churros.  Yesterday, one of the guys in our neighborhood offered to bring all of the buns for the hot dogs and hamburgers.  He is a baker at the Reams close to the house.  He also brought churros that he made, too.  Churros that they make at the Reams bakery.  These had to be the best churros I have ever tasted or eaten in my entire life.  They were huge around.  They were perfectly cooked and I probably can never look at another churro in my life and I can never go to Reams.  I will dream of those churros the rest of my life.

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