CoCo's Corner

Had to wear this shirt to my doctor  appointment.    So it's been 16 days since that fateful walk into the St. Marks ER.  I ended up staying there for five days.  Diagnosed with Cirrhosis of the liver.  And facing an unknown journey and not knowing how it will end. What have the last 16 days brought??  Well, I've let you know about the TPN.  Tonight, it goes down to a 12-hour drip.  It will be nice to have half my day free from IVY.  She gets a bit clingy.  So I feel like I can breathe and accomplish some life tasks. I still get pretty tired.  Mostly when I'm attached to IVY.  She gets pretty heavy when I'm trying to accomplish things at home.  She starts to wear on my left shoulder and my neck.  I've been waking up with horrible muscle pain in my neck and shoulder.  So, I take a bath in Bengay or put on a Lidocaine patch.  Take two Tylenol for the pain.  Usually after that, I am functioning p...

 I just decided to do another post after spending my first night in my own bed with my new sexy bed partner.  TPN. TPN - Total Parenteral Nutrition.  Calories, vitamins, minerals and all that delivered through an intravenous line. PICC line -  A little stronger and more durable than a regular IV line.  It's inserted, via ultrasound, into a vein.  Mine is in my upper right arm.   IV Pump - an electrical system that pumps the IV fluid from my bag into my veins.   In essence, I have an IV bag, when first attached to my PICC line, it probably weighs 15 to 20 pounds.  It is kept in a backpack, so I can be mobile.  I have the pump plugged in, to keep it charged, when I'm not mobile and trying to get my home back in order after being gone for five days in the hospital. Me and my sexy new bed partner.  I know, I'm gorgeous.  Skinnier than a prepubescent 12-year-old boy and a mess.  Don't judge.  I'm working on it!! ...

This week has been one for the books.  There has been some good things, not so good things and more.  I will explain. Last Saturday, my daughter and I drove to Idaho Falls.  We went to visit my bonus daughter and her family.  I wasn't feeling great.  But I wasn't feeling horrible.  By the time I got home, I had a lot of swelling.  I have been dealing with that for a few months.  I had started to see a specialist about my liver and my pancreas.  I had recently started a medication, it is a very pricey medication, but it's supposed to help me break down calories and nutrients so that my body absorbs them.  Even though I eat, my body was just shedding the nutrients and food I was eating and making it so I was not gaining weight.  I was 95 pounds.  And nothing I did would gain weight.  But I've gained 20 pounds over the last few months.  My clothes were uncomfortable.  But, I don't know if it's just the water retenti...

Thea was the last of the littles to go on her special trip. We left bright and early on a Monday morning and went to Orange County. The seats getting there got tighter and tighter and I ended up using almost all of my miles to make sure we would get there. That made me pretty sad. We got to the hotel, they charged me $50 to do an early checkin. That was less than they charged me when I took Harper. We uber'ed to the park. It was so very cold!!!! It rained our entire time there, pretty much. Our first day was in California Adventure. It was kind of frustrating. So many rides were "broken" or out of service due to the rain. We did manage to get on a few. She loved the Muppets 3-D movie. She loved the Crush feature - so cute. But, sad that we couldn't go on Luigi or Ariel. Soaring came back up before we left, so we went and got on that. We left shortly after that. We went back to the hotel, soaking wet, and got our swimsuits on and went and hung out in...

This last year has been the hardest one of my life. And I've had a lot of hard years in my lifetime. But this year involved the health of me and I'm being a little selfish about thinking about just me. But it was hard. But, I survived it. And now I'm learning to THRIVE. A little history. For the last four years, I have been dealing with knee pain. Most of it was in my right knee. For the first couple of years, I would get a cortisone shot and I was good. Usually last for at least a year. Then the cortisone wasn't working anymore. I had the rooster comb injections. They didn't work. So, after that, my doctor told me that I was bone on bone and needed a knee replacement. But for that four years, she kept saying - you're too fat, no surgeon will touch you at your weight. You have got to lose weight. That is always easier said than done. She always made me feel like I was failing at taking care of myself. For the last two years, I have been worki...

It's been a weird few days. I don't know what set me off. But, I've been thinking about Ted a lot. Mostly, I've been thinking about the night he died. And everything that happened that night. One of the girls I worked with lost her husband suddenly a couple of days ago. I'm not sure if that's what set me off - no, I'm pretty sure it is. So I've been going through old blog posts about our trips together. Looking at memories of our times together. We just had fun together and we just loved each other. Anyway, I've been reliving the night he died. Thinking about it pretty consistently. And the things that happened are truly haunting me. Like, how did he get where he was?? He and I had been sitting together and had literally just had an interaction. The interaction was, please sit back, you're blocking my view of the movie. And it was all done in hand gestures. But it was just so Ted. Completely and totally so Ted. Not even a few...

Harper had her opportunity to go on her one-on-one trip with me this last week. We had a wonderful time. We caught the very early flight to get to Orange County. Uber'ed to the hotel. Checked in and Uber'ed to the park. We spent our first afternoon in Disneyland. We didn't get a lot done, but we managed to get most of Fantasyland, Tiki Room and Pirates of the Carribean done before we headed back to the pool. My whole body hurt. I was really happy to spend some time in the hot tub. And I did that EVERY night. The second day we spent at California Adventure. This is the first time ever that I did not go on Soarin'. The wait was just too long. But we did manage to get almost everything else we wanted to get done finished up and we had a great time. I found these pickles. They were so freaking good. I had cravings for them the rest of the trip and after. The last day was spent at Disneyland. We finished up pretty much everything else we wanted to go on....