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So sad!

How does a little girl you watched grow up end up being the meth scarred face starring at you from a mug shot in a newspaper that happened to be with the guy who gets killed by a cop after a burglary in small town Utah??

I met Emily Rose Tolman when she was four years old. Crystal was four, also. We had just moved into our house in Kearns and this little face was peering over the retaining wall. She wanted to know if she could play. From that day on, Emily and Crystal was joined at the hip. Crystal started kindergarten that fall and Emily was a year behind her. But, that didn't stop them. They were friends throughout high school. Emily struggled as a teenager with some rebellion, just like a lot of kids. She had a boyfriend, who lived in Elko, Nevada. Her parents didn't quite know what to do about it. They ended up turning her over to her boyfriend and saying she was his problem. The two of them got married shortly after. Emily and Lee have three children. Crystal and Emily tried to stay in contact, but lost track of each other, like alot of school aged kids do. They would get together now and then - Lee was in the Air Force and Crystal went to Minot, North Dakota to visit them once. Emily came to Brandon and Crystal's wedding reception. She came to the hospital when Zachary was born. She came to Ted and my reception. Then she kind of disappeared again. We didn't hear much from her until one day I ran into her mom at the store. Emily was in the hospital, near death, because of a heart problem. She was very ill and in ICU. Crystal and Brandon took her gifts after she finally recovered and was able to come home.

A few months after she got out of the hospital, Crystal got a call from Emily. She was leaving her husband and her children. She had all kinds of stories about the reasons behind it. We all helped her move out of her house and into an apartment. I remember seeing that devastated face on Lee as his life was kind of crumbling - you could tell he still really loved her. But, something was different. Something wasn't right. We took her to dinner with us a couple of times, I gave her some money because she wasn't working, Crystal was at her beck and call (by the way, Crystal was pregnant with Chelsea at the time). It kind of came together when we were at dinner one night, Emily came and hugged me - the stench of marijuana just clung to her. Emily had taken a wrong turn somewhere. She was hanging out with some bad and wrong people - but, she still kind of clung to Crystal - Crystal was there for her.

It went wrong pretty quickly - and she moved back with Lee. We haven't really heard from her since. Her little brother called me one day for advice, because Emily and Lee had broken up again - and now was refusing to allow anyone to see the kids. Then I heard that Lee had the kids and was living with Emily's mother with them. Not really sure what the status is now of that situation.

Somewhere she was lost. She turned the wrong way and kept going. I'm so devastated for her mother. I can't even imagine what she must be going through. I keep remembering that four-year-old face peering over the wall and it's not that face I see looking at me that has aged like crazy and is covered in meth sores. I so hope this is the wake up call she needs to take the turn back in the right direction.

Comments

  1. Your post is so much more put together then mine! Everything is so jumbled to me. I cant work it out. I love you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Your post is outstanding!! It is from the heart.

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  3. Colleen, my husband came home from work telling me about one of his customers who called him that day to say someone broke into his story & tried to run over an officer & was shot & killed. And for what?? A VERY small amount of cash. That night we watched it on the news & when they showed the female's picture I looked at my husband & said "u sure can't tell she's a meth user"! being my sarcastic self. So sad. But it sounds like u & Crystal have tried ur best with her. She has to want the help as u know. Hopefully with friends like u, she will see the light.

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