Skip to main content

Moving Forward

Today marks one month since I left my old life behind and moved onward to a new one.  As I've posted before, it was not an easy decision - and I honestly kept thinking that I wouldn't be where I am today when I walked away.  I kept thinking I would wake up and the nightmare would be done.  But, that didn't happen.

I spent the first week very angry.  And when I realized that my life was moving in a positive direction and not a negative one - I moved on.

The last month has been a whirlwind.  I started projects, none of which are finished.  I went on an amazing road trip - that had to be cut short.  I started a new job.  That is a pretty full month.

The new job started out pretty shaky at first - well, shaky for about two days. The intimidation of the reality had me a little freaked out.  I am the oldest of the new hires.  That came with perks, too - as being oldest made me first in seniority.  But, for the next three months, I don't have weekends off - I have days off during the week. That doesn't bother me - at all.  I am pretty adaptable to shift work, different hours, so on and so forth.  It's a temporary job and there are no guarantees that after the summer I will be continuing on - but, that isn't important to me.  This whole experience is what is important to me.

The last two days, I have been able to be out and working with customers.  I have been able to be learning - hands on. I have been helping people and doing it with an honest to goodness happy smile.  I have been meeting new co-workers.  I have made a new friend - a couple of them, but one in particular.

Ted and I were having a conversation. I still love the people from my old life.  I love them very much.  Almost daily, I hear from different people who tell me that things are still horrible and getting worse.  I hear from them how they are looking for new employment.  How they wish I was still there, as I was the sanity in the old place, that I understood them and I cared about them - which they don't feel that anyone else does now.  While, deep down that makes me so sad for the friends I left behind, it also validates my feelings.  I miss them all, but I made the right decision.   When Ted and I talked about this, he looked at me and said, "I have never seen you happier than you have been in the last two weeks, I'm glad you walked away".  I guess that says it all.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

CoCo's Journey - Ah, Shit!!!

I am exhausted.  Physically.  Mentally.  Is there anything else??  Because I'm sure that is exhausted, too. I went to the doctor today.  I knew it was going to be a lot of information.  I had made a list.  I had my notebook.  I printed out all of the information from my emergency room visit on Saturday to take with me.  Blood tests.  CT Scan.  Urine test.  Plus, I brought my CT scan from March, because I noticed on it that I have a small umbilical hernia.  I was ready.  And I knew what I needed to fight for. I also came armed with gifts.  I love this doctor and his medical assistant so much.  I took them a gift of tortilla chips and homemade salsa.  And I wrote a love note on the bag.  That is how much I appreciate him.  They both loved it.  It even made Hayley get a little weepy, cuz she was having a bad day. I gave him all of my documents, and he went through the blood tests and such fr...

CoCo's Journey - Sleeping with Jeff AND Camilla

  Well, the day has come and gone.  I got my new and fancy attachment coming out of my face.  It was a horrible experience.  I thought I was going to go absolutely insane and take out the people putting it in me.  But, let's talk about it real quick. I got an NJ tube.  I thought I was going to be getting an NG tube.  What is an NJ tube?  It's a tube for feeding that is placed through the nose and snaked down past the stomach and into the jejunal.  The jejunal is in the small intestine.  The nasojejunal tube is more complex and has a few more risks than the nasogastric tube.  But, apparently, it's the best choice for me.   So let's talk about the actual procedure.  I knew from the beginning, when they squirted lidocaine in my two nostrils to kind of deaden it that it was going to be COMPLETELY horrible!!!  And then needed me to sniff it down to kind of deaden my throat, to make the tube a little more comfortable g...

CoCo's Journey - Up Your Nose with a Rubber Hose

Sun wasn't even up when I headed to the hospital Today, I had my first albumin infusion.  I have it at the Cancer Center.  It lasts about four hours.  They get an IV started and slowly infuse the albumin.  Today, I learned a lot: Don't take your own snacks.  They have great snacks and beverages.  And you don't have to haul all that stuff. Four hours, sitting in a little curtained room, is really not bad.  I snoozed, I snacked, I watched TV, I played on my phone. Make sure you take your power pack. If they ask you if you want a heated blanket, the answer is always YES.  I had three by the time I left.  I told the adorable CNA fella that I planned to just look like a pile of blankets by the time I was ready to leave. In October, we wear Halloween fare The side effects are headaches and achy muscles.  I'm the lucky one that gets both.  I'm doing ok tonight.  I don't get headaches, I'm used to achy muscles.  I limit my intake ...